Archive | January, 2011

Child Suspended For Finger Gun! Why Obama?

24. January 2011

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Child Suspended For Finger Gun!  Why Obama?

Obama’s gun-hating Nazis are at it again, this time in Oklahoma.  Apparently a first grader was suspended for making a simple gun hand gesture and pretending to shoot at other students.  This is ridiculous.  They are trying to brain wash our children at an early age and make them believe that shooting guns at people [...]

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An Angelic Battle-Hymn For Sweet Sarah Palin

17. January 2011

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An Angelic Battle-Hymn For Sweet Sarah Palin

My sons and I were at the local Wal-Mart trying to find some good wholesome Christian music tapes to listen to while they work on their home-school science fair project.  Hunter is creating a diorama of Jesus slaying a brontosaurus with prayer and using it to feed the poor.  Scout is proving liberal scientists are [...]

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Diet Sodas Are A Hoax!

10. January 2011

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Diet Sodas Are A Hoax!

I’ve often spoken against drinking diet sodas as they are typically in fashion for homosexuals and French people and just feel un-American in general, but now I have even more reason to hate diet soda pop.  My son, Hunter, has found himself with what some might call a weight problem.  I’ve attempted to explain to [...]

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Constitution is so awesome, it cost taxpayers $1.1 million for the House to read it!

6. January 2011

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Constitution is so awesome, it cost taxpayers $1.1 million for the House to read it!

Today, the House of Representatives read the entire Constitution (well, just the important parts) during their session.  The reading ended up costing about $1.1 million dollars.  If that doesn’t prove what an awesome document the Constitution is, I don’t know what does.  Heck, Imagine how much it would have cost to read the bible, because [...]

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Buffets Are a Tool of The Devil And a Communist Plot

3. January 2011

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Buffets Are a Tool of The Devil And a Communist Plot

After church service yesterday, I decided to treat my children to a wonderful lunch at a local food buffet.  I’ve always enjoyed buffets, with their cornucopia of wonderful foods, from Salisbury Steak to Chop Suey to Vanilla Pudding by the heaping bowlful.  I often imagine that this is how Jesus and his angel friends eat [...]

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